Desperate for money
Stepping out of the shower one morning, a beautiful young
woman wraps
herself in a towel and tells her husband it's his turn to use the shower. Just
then, the doorbell rings. She goes downstairs to the door, and it's their
neighbor Bill, whose jaw drops at the sight of the lovely bride wrapped in
only a towel. He pulls two hundred-dollar bills out of his pocket and says
they're hers if she'll drop the towel to her waist.
"We could really use the $200.00," she thinks and drops the towel a
few inches.
Bill gasps at the sight and pulls out two more hundred-dollar bills and offers
them to her too if she'll drop the towel altogether.
"Well, I've already compromised myself, and we COULD use the money,"
she thinks. She lets the towel fall to the floor. Bill takes a good look,
thanks her, hands over the money, and leaves. She closes the door and goes
back upstairs, just as her husband is getting out of the shower. He asks,
"Who was it, Honey?"
When she tells him it was Bill, he asks, "Did he say anything about the
$400.00 he owes me?"
Watch your manners in Texas
Two men are driving through Texas when they get pulled over
by a state trooper. The trooper walks up taps on the window with his
nightstick, the driver rolls down
the window and "WHACK", the trooper smacks him in the head with the
stick.
The driver says, "What the hell was that for?"
The trooper says, "You're in Texas, son. When we pull you over, you
better have your license ready when we get to your car."
The driver says, "I'm sorry, officer, I'm not from around here."
The trooper runs a check on the guy's license, and he's clean. He gives the
guy his license back and walks around to the passenger side and taps on the
window. The passenger rolls his window down, and "WHACK", the
trooper smacks him with the nightstick too.
The passenger says, "What'd you do that for?"
The trooper says, "Just making your wish come true."
The passenger says, "Huh?"
The trooper says, "I know that two miles down the road you're gonna say
'I wish that jerk would've tried that crap with me.' "
Car trouble
Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger. They tried and tried to get the door open, but they couldn't. The girl with the coat hanger stopped for a moment, to catch her breath, and her friend said anxiously,
"Hurry up! It's starting to rain and the top is down."
