The story...a bit long one to read but donīt give up on it
Hope youīll have anything with you when you go....!
Short background:
You know I am a transgender...or in another term transexual!!
it hurts to be in such a situation. People are so cruel to you!!!!!
Well your body also seems to be a prison too...with all things
that seems unfit for your body it sure did for me...
This increased over the years...many criminal acts and many
selfdestructive acts too...Well praised the lord who was beside
me all the way! You know I met him later on but read on now!
A high price to pay:
I have been struggling all my growth from early teens to the age
I have now 30 years old. Knowing that something is wrong!!
Well this problem never looked like it would end...end it never
has...done so. You know that being a transexual is a lifetime
project , but it hasnīt have to be so bad in the end!
Well to make a complicated story easier to understand I will try
to make it as short and easy read as possible.
Iīve grown up in a strongly critical family christian too...
Well at least to the name , it gave me a bad picture of christians
To continue I have never done anything right in their eyes or in
a their morally ways. Well my transgender problem did suffer
badly through this,,, well moved from home in late of 1989.
Got my own apartment and lived on my own , separated and
broke contact with the family , several times until it was a
closed option to go back there anymore. At least from my side!
But I wanted to live,,,live,,,and live again. Well did some
communtiy service under 1990 until late of october.
An opening to a new life?:
Well in October 1990 I gave myself to Jesus Christ as I
beleived him to be my only answer to go on with my life. I
also got a new mother , yes I did she meant all things I lost in
my early life. But the lord had to take her home in late of
1992,,,
It completely broke my heart but praised to be the lord he was
there for me again...I can tell you that I never had to give in
any of my wishes to get anything and to be a Woman. A
complete person...well closely enough!
The start sequence:
Well started in May 1992 to going to a psychiatrist who was to
decide if I was ready for a complete sexchange.
...worked for "wellfare money" in between! Also were home
and written as retired by the local doctorīs.
*2*This went on until late 1993 then they started to give me
my hormone therapy...that is also for lifetime!
*1*In the beginning April 1993 it was decided by the
authoritys that my name and medical treatments was an option
to start with,,,that gave me a new name and my hormones.
Pause a few moments if you wish now!:
Ok,,,thank you for hanging in there..........
To the end of the story:
Well in January 1995 with a long time of struggling I got my
surgery,,,at last! And praised to be Jesus again...because he had
been there all the time...counted my tears and counted my
sighs. Well he had me completely in his hands all the time.
Do you think it was easy,,,,,,,so many times I wanted to give in!
Well it never stopped,,, always a new crack with light where I
got new strength to go on!
Conclusion of this story:
Well today I am a member of a baptist church...
the struggling never ends...but Jesus loves me as I am and he
never let me go away. I love him too that is why youīre reading
this now. Being a transexual is all through life a struggle!!!
Many things with your body never seems to be in a perfect way
; slim , fat ; tall , short ; beard , no beard ; hair , no hair ; to
much there and to little there well an impossible list to end.
Jesus loves you as you are and
he knows your struggles!!!
Give in to Jesus you too...it will give you the peace youīre
looking for in a wunderful way. He will help you through your
life in a blessed way too....He loves you!!
Never forget that youīre loved by a living God who can and
whoīs waiting for your calling!!!
An important add:
Let no one make you think anything else....you can and will
become a whole person just if you donīt give in,,, and also
you should consider become a Christian itīs not only for this
life itīs for the afterlife too you know.
Please...let Jesus save you itīs not for me you should do it.
Itīs for your own good you should do it.
Itīs a decision for the eternety you must make!!!
You wonīt get another chance later on! if you die before...
Because of him yours....Sannalena
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