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"As she fell deeper and deeper down into her own emotional
entrapment, she realized that she could not be harmed.she could be hurt,she could
be beaten and bruised, she could get her heart ripped out a
million times by a million different men, but in the end she would still have her
soul, and as long as her soul was alive she would be able to see hope behind the
black walls of empty, lonely existence that surrounded her. She had tripped as a
kid, and was still falling, towards a darkness she presumed would contain a bottom
somewhere deep down, and she knew that she was gonna smash into it sooner or
later....
Her family, her friends, infact most of her life as far back as
she could remember, was just an eternal blur of pain, why hadnt she seen this
before? Someone tripped her over when she was really young, and she fell...And
fell..And fell....She had been to busy falling and looking at all the wonders
that a journey into self can reveal, to see that her soul was actually
hurting...Like a newborn child when its absorbed into a state of
curiosity, blinded by some amazing descovery that only the child itself can
see, she was blind to everything else but the exitement of descovering new places
in her own mind..She had not been living these years of destruction that filled
her fragile body, she had not been living these experiences, she had been watching
them from a distance, like it was a show on tv, and now, as she was shure she would
soon hit the bottom of this black pit, it all came tumbling down on her, forcing
her to the ground, as she all of a sudden came in contact with her own being.....
They, who called themselves her friends, her family, her guides in
life, had been suceccful in making her believe that she did not have the strenght
nor the right to question the life she was in, they had printed it in her mind
that the only thing she could do was to supress all of her dreams and opinions
and submit to the fact that she was theirs to rule over. She realized, as she came
closer and closer to her own thoughts and feelings, that the voice inside of her
that she had burried and nearly forgotten about, wasnt stupid thoughts and silly
remarks as the people around her had made her believe... It was her heart, her
God, her soul...it was...her..."
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