| What do you do when the dishwasher won't work?
Kick her.
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Why are cyclones/tornadoes usually named after women?
Because what starts off as a small blow ends up taking half your house.
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| Why is a fat woman like a moped?
They're both fun to ride, but you wouldn't want your friends to see you on either.
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What's the best thing about a blowjob?
Ten minutes of silence.
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| What's the best definition of a woman?
A life support system for a pussy.
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What two things in the air can make a woman pregnant?
Her legs.
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| What's the smartest thing ever to come out of a woman's mouth?
Albert Einstein's dick.
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What's the only bad thing about the 69 position ?
The view.
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| How do you know God meant for men to eat pussy?
Why else would he make it look like a taco?
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What's the most active muscle in a woman?
The penis.
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| Why do women pay more attention to their appearance than to improving their minds?
Because most men are stupid, but few are blind.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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