Din Mammas Sida!
Yo Mama Is So Fat...
...she sat on a quarter and squeezed a booger out of George Washington's
nose!
...she's got more rolls than a bakery.
...she looks like the michellin man.
...they woudln't let her to enter a sumo wrestling contest.
...she has her own gravitational pull.
...she tripped in Queens and landed in the Bronx.
...scientists saw her through a telescope and declared her a new
universe.
...before God said let there be light, he said get your fat ass
out of the way!
...if i wanted to screw her i'd have to roll her in flour and look
for a wet spot.
...that the last time she saw 90210 she was on a scale.
...she had to use a pillow as a tampon!
...she got hit by a bus, turned around and yelled, "Who threw that
rock?"
...she makes FreeWilly look like a tic-tac
...she got a glass leg and filled it with kool-aid
...kids thought she was moon bounce!
...she's got more chins than a Hong Kong phonebook.(I like
this one!)
...she makes bigbird look like a rubber ducky!
...when she went to school she sat next to ever body
...she eats wheat thicks.
...you put 4 qurters in her ear & a bag of Doritos pop out
...she sat on a rainbow and Skittles popped out
...she plays pool with the planets
...she uses a VCR as a Beeper
..we are in her right now.
...when she puts on a red jogging suit the kids say hay it's the
Koolaid guy!
...she walked in front of the TV and we missed 2 episodes of mash.
...she jumped up in the air and got stuck.
...when she wears a malcom X shirt helicoptors try to land on her.
...she uses king size beds as maxi pads.
...she uses a highway as a slip and slide!
...when she wears a Malcome X T-Shirt Helicoptors try to land on
her.
...she's got more nooks and crannies than an English Muffin
...they had to let out the shower curtain
...she wears a watch on each arm. One for each time zone
...her blood type is Ragu
...after she gets through turning around, they throw her a welcome
back party
...she don't take pictures, she takes posters
...her baby pictures were taken by satellite
...she wipes herself with a mattress
...her picture weighs ten pounds
...that when she puts on high heels in the morning, by the afternoon,
they're flats
...she could sell shade
...she bumps into people even when she's sitting down
...that after sex, she rolls over and smokes a ham
...she's on both sides of the family
...she sat on a quarter and George washingtons brains poped out
Yo Mama Is So Stupid...
...she took toilet paper to a crap game.
...she brought a knife to a shoot out
...she sold her car for gas money.
...she called me to ask me for my phone number.
...she failed a urine test.
...I tell her to buy me a color t.v., and she asks,What color?"
...when she saw Jesus walk across the water she said"It's gotta
be the shoes."
...she jumped through a window to see what was on the other side.
...she tripped over a cordless phone.
...the bitch put a phone up her ass 'cause she was expecting a
booty call!
...she got trapped in a grocery store and starved to death
...she put make-up on her forehead to make up her mind!
...she sits on the TV and watches the couch.
...she heard it was chilly outside, she took a spoon.
...she got hit by a parked car.
...when somebody said it was chilly outside she went and got a
bowl.
...she thought a quarter back was a refund.
...she had your brother thrown in rehab, cause he was Hooked on
Phonics
...she thinks MCI is a rapper
...she called information to get the number to 911
...she thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican phone company
...she asked her boss how to spell UPS
...she couldn't find eleven when trying to dial 911
...she thought Boys II Men was a day care center
...she saw a sign saying 2 cookies for a dollar, so she threw down
2 cookies and asked "where's my dollar?"
...she sits on the TV and watches the couch.
...she thinks elevators are mobile homes
...she thought Malcom X was Malcom the tenth
Yo Mama Is So Old...
...she's got an autographed version of the bible!
...she went into a antique store and they tried to keep her
...she dreams re-runs.
...her birthday expired.
...she owes Jesus a dollar.
...she was a waitress at the last supper.
...when she blew a fart accient dust came out
...that when she went to a haunted house, she came out with a job
application
...she scares people even with the lights out
Yo Mama Is So Ugly...
...when she tried to work a street corner Johns paid her to leave.
...she walks down the street and gets aressted for attempted murder.
...she's like Taco Bell. When people see her, they run for the
border
...it looks like her neck threw up
...she went into a haunted house and came out with a job Application
...when she walks by the bathroom the toilet flushes.
Yo Mama Is So Stank...
...she makes the RIGHT GAURD turn left
...right guard turned left and speed stick slowed down.
...secret told on her.
...she worked at a sperm bank and got fired for drinking on the
job.
...she put on secret and the shit told.
...she keeps ice between her legs to keep the crabs fresh
Yo Mama Is So Dark...
...she went to night school and was marked absent!
...she spits chocolate milk!
...that she can leave fingerprints on charcoal.
...she has to wear white gloves when she eats Tootsie Rolls to
keep from eating her fingers.
...when people refer to Darkness comming in the future they refer
to her next visit.
...they made a movie of her heart transplant called "From the darkest
heart of Africa"
Yo Mama Is Like...
...a J.C Penny, discounts every day.
...a Coke machine give her 2 quarters and she gives you a pop.
...a bowling ball, She gets fingered, dropped and thrown down the
lane.
...a door knob.... Everybody gets their turn.
...swiss chalet, so much for so little
...burger king, do it your way right a way
...a hardware store 5 cents a screw.
...a phone booth she's on every corner and she costs 25 cents.
...a bus every one geting on and off.
...a bus 75 cents a ride.
...a door nob every one gets a turn.
...a 747, but not every one has been on a 747!
...a vacuum cleaner, she sucks, she blows, and she gets laid in
the closet.
...a blowpop. First you suck. Then U blow
...a Shotgun. First she cocks, then she blows.
...a t.v.,a two year old can turn her on!
...McDonalds, Ronald makes it magic
...a 747, 3 man cock pit!!!!
Miscellaneous
Yo Mama is so slow it takes her an hour and a half to watch 60
minutes!
Your mama's like a lollipop, everyone wants a fuckin lick!
Your mama is such a slut, someone yelled HOEDOWN and she hit the
floor.
Would you please tell your mama to stop changing her lipstick color,
I'm starting to get a RAINBOW on my dick. (a classic!)
Your mama's so Hairy bigfoot was taking pitures of her!
Your mama's lips are so big, Chapstick had to invent a spray can!
Your mama is so horny, her vibrator has dual exhaust
Your mama's breath is so foul, she uses Glade as a breath freshener
Your house is so nasty, I tripped over a rat, & a cockroach
stole my wallet
Your house is so nasty, even the cockroaches wear slippers
Your mama's lips are so fat, that they look like my ass sideways
Your mama's belly has got so many rolls on it, that she has to
screw on her pants
Your mama's nose is so big, we use her bugers as basketballs
Your mama's feet are so big, Bozo be envious
Your Mama's so dopey she thinks its the ice cubes that keeps the
fridge cold
Your house is so small the welcome mat just says wel...
Your Mama's so dirty that she had to cut the strings off her tampons
because the crabs were going bungy jumping
Your Mama's teeth are so yellow that when she smiles cars slow
down
I saw your mama the other day kicking a tin can. I asked her what
she was doing and she said moving house
Your mamas reminds me of a toilet. Shes fat, shes white and she
smells like shit.
Your house is so small, the front door and the back door are on
the same hinge.
Yo Mama so poor, I said whats for dinner, and she put her foot
on the table and said "corn!"
Yo Mama got no legs talkn' bout how she used to kick it.
Yo mama's so bald when she puts on a turtle neck she looks like
a busted condom.
Yo mama's so skinny she swallowed a marble and looked nine months
pregnant.
Yo mama is so poor her t.v has two channells off and on
Your mama Dj's for the Ice cream truck
Yo mama's so poor, that I saw her at KFC lickin other peoples fingers.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow when she smiled Dorthy found OZ
Yo mama's house is so dusty, the roaches ride around in dune-buggies.
Yo mama is so skinny her nipples touch.
Your mama got so much pit hair she looks like shes got Don King
in a headlock.