Instead of Astrological Signs, how about these ..

What's Your Business Sign?

1) MARKETING

You are ambitious yet stupid. You chose a marketing degree to avoid

having to study in college, concentrating instead on drinking and

socializing which is pretty much what your job responsibilities

are now. Least compatible with Sales.

2) SALES

Laziest of all signs, often referred to as "marketing without a

degree." You are also self centered and paranoid. Unless someone

calls

you and begs you to take their money, you like to avoid contact with

customers so you can "concentrate on the big picture." You seek

admiration for your golf game throughout your life.

3)TECHNOLOGY

Unable to control anything in your personal life, you are instead

content to completely control everything that happens at your

workplace. Often even YOU don't understand what you are saying but

who the hell can tell. It is written that Geeks shall inherit the

Earth.

4) ENGINEERING

One of only two signs that actually studied in school. It is said

that

ninety percent of all Personal Ads are placed by engineers. You can

be happy with yourself; your office is full of all the latest

"ergodynamic" gadgets. However, we all know what is really causing

your "carpal tunnel syndrome."

5) ACCOUNTING

The only other sign that studied in school. You are mostly immune

from office politics. You are the most feared person in the

organization; combined with your extreme organizational traits, the

majority of rumors concerning you say that you are completely

insane.

6) HUMAN RESOURCES

Ironically, given your access to confidential information, you t

end to be the biggest gossip within the organization. Possibly the

only other person that does less work than marketing, you are unable

to

return any calls today because you have to get a haircut, have lunch

AND

then mail a letter.

7) MANAGEMENT/MIDDLE MANAGEMENT

Catty, cut-throat, yet completely spineless, you are destined to

remain at your current job for the rest of your life. Unable to make

a single decision you tend to measure your worth by the number of

meetings you can schedule for yourself. Best suited to marry other

"Middle Managers" as everyone in you social circle is a "Middle

Manager."

8) SENIOR MANAGEMENT(See above - Same sign, different title)

9) CUSTOMER SERVICE

Bright, cheery, positive, you are a fifty-cent cab ride from taking

your own life. As children very few of you asked your parents for a

little cubicle for your room and a headset so you could pretend to

play "Customer Service." Continually passed over for promotions,

your best bet is to sleep with your manager. 10) CONSULTANT

Lacking any specific knowledge, you use acronyms to avoid revealing

your utter lack of experience. You have convinced yourself that your

"skills" are in demand and that you could get a higher paying job

with any other organization in a heartbeat. You will spend an

eternity contemplating these career opportunities without ever taking

direct action.

11) RECRUITER, "HEADHUNTER"

As a "person" that profits from the success of others, you are

disdained by most people who actually work for a living. Paid on commission

and susceptible to alcoholism, your ulcers and frequent heart attacks

correspond directly with fluctuations in the stock market.

12) PARTNER, PRESIDENT, CEO

You are brilliant or lucky. Your inability to figure out complex

systems such as the fax machine suggest the latter.

13) GOVERNMENT WORKER

Paid to take days off. Government workers are genius inventors, like

the invention of new Holidays. They usually suffer from deep

depression or anxiety and usually commit serious crimes while on the