Warning Labels ---------------------- In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods: * On Sears hair dryer: Do not use while sleeping * On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary Details inside * On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap * Some Swanson frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost * On a hotel-provided shower cap in a box: Fits one head *On Tesco's Tiramisu desert: Do not turn upside down (Printed on the bottom of the box) * On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating * On packaging for a Rowenta Iron: Do not iron clothes on body * On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine Do not drive car or operate machinery * On Nytol (a sleep aid): Warning: may cause drowsiness * On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning keep out of children * On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only * On a Japanese food processor: Not to be used for the other use * On Sainsbury's Peanuts Warning: contains nuts * On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts * On a Swedish chain saw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands